Karen Kingsbury & I

I just finished my weekend as a volunteer at Karen Kingsbury's booth at the OKC Women of Joy conference.  It was delightful and exhausting and exhilirating,

First of all, I just wish to throw a disclaimer out there, that Karen, herself, said the best exercise for your liver is laughter.  So, get ready to exercise your livers, because you know if I am out to make a good impression, and TRYING to do my best, what the results usually turn out to be.

Well, let's just say, I was TRYING my VERY best to make a good impression.

D.I.S.A.S.T.E.R.

The first couple of days went great.  Everyone knows I'm a selling machine, (except those poor unsuspecting ladies at the WOJ conference) and even the best intentioned person, that only wanted to buy one pitiful book, usually ended up with 5 Baxter Books AND a tote bag to carry it in.  I don't play when it comes to selling.  Especially Karen Kingsbury's stuff. 

The problem is, I need to realize my strengths and stick to them.  At all costs.  For everyone's sake. 

Today, Karen's right hand man, Will (yes, girls, he's a hottie)

asked me to take pictures after Karen's talk, when she was signing books for the patient women that wait in line to have the chance to meet her and get her autograph. 

My job, and ONLY job, was to use Karen's camera and take pictures of her and her adoring fans for facebook.   It's one camera, right??  How hard can it be?  I take pictures, right?  I have a camera.  I am a competent, self-assured women, that can stare grizzlies in the face and back them down with a snarl.  Right?  Right?

Well. 

In retrospect, I wish my children had been there to remind me that, USUALLY I am only IN the pictures, never TAKING the pictures.  I did fine with the camera that was supplied to me, but the cameras shoved at me, by the waiting adoring women (which, if you've EVER stood in one of those lines, you know that those sweet, Christian ladies become WWF fighters if their place in line is challenged) and before long, Karen Kingsbury, famous author, writer of movies, excellent wife and mother, beautiful speaker in front of large crowds, was practically having to hold EACH camera and take pictures of herself AND the lady she was autographing the books for.    YES..  practically having to write me step by step instructions.   In my defense (which is shaky at best), I was handed flip phones, iphones (which I did thankfully know how to use), smart phones, dumb phones, phones that didn't even take pictures, cameras that were turned off and had to be turned on, and cameras so smart I just had to stand there and hold them.  People, it was mayhem.  And my job was to keep the line moving and mayhem at bay.  I. Failed. Miserably.  All I managed to do well, was keep a brand new sharpie in my hand, so when hers ran out, I was Johnny on the spot.   I did that well.  And that was all.  And my type of personality doesn't take a failure well.  So of course, after leaving the event, I climbed in my car, defeated and embarrassed, having let Karen Kingsbury down so completely and utterly and cried for 10 minutes. 

Then wiped off my tears, and started writing this blog in my head.  So everyone could share in my misery, and exercise their livers right along with me. 

I would love to say that we spent 2 hours together and I got to share with her Laynie's wonderful story, and through her tears over my perfect, beautiful heartfelt words, she assures me that, not only will she help me publish my book, she also wants to have Laynie as a character in her next book, and that because I am obviously such an incredible person to be around, that she would love to offer me a job as her personal assistant, to read all of her books, and help her brainstorm. 

Yep, I wish I could say that. 

Here's what really happened.  Yes, I met her.  Yes, we liked each other.  Yes, she is just as beautiful in person as on her bookcovers (even more so).  Yes, she is a TRUE woman of God.  I knew immediately we would and could become friends, in spite of myself and my swan ability.   But, instead of sharing a 5 minute elevator version of Laynie's story, when, I had Karen Kingsbury's complete and undivided attention, I lost my brain and couldn't even remember how to spell my name for her to autograph my book.  And stupidly asked her if she would like to read my book  (because she hasn't heard that 2.5 million times already).   Just because you're a doctor, and someone finds out you are a doctor and starts asking you questions about their colon, and expect you to just fix their colon problem, even though you are a foot doctor. (Ok, this might be a dumb example) BUT,  I think Karen Kingsbury gets "Please help me with my book" a lot.   And I'm sorry I wasted that valuable, precious moment in time, bringing that up.  

Because I would have much rather told her that in reading her Baxter series, she helped my family heal from losing Laynie.  She was able to touch the parts of our hearts that we needed specific touches to, and start our healing process.  We all read them, and had huge discussion on the merits of being a Baxter and if given a chance, would wrestle each other for a place at their table.  I grieved when Ashley and Landon lost their precious Sarah, and was just awestruck how a writer could tap the feelings so perfectly of losing a child and feeling the preciousness and the grief so acutely.    I would have told her that the very first book I read was with Daisy, the down syndrome adult, that, with her friends, had some loud, exhuberant prayer in McDonalds and made me laugh out loud at their antics, and so soon after losing Laynie, I didn't know when I would ever laugh again. 

I would have told her that I am so blessed to know that, in reading her books, that I finally understood the voice of God in my head as a certainty.  I have heard His voice my whole life, and never credited it being God, and after reading her books, I understand that quiet voice, and now I listen, and obey.

So, when Karen Kingsbury finally lifts the restraining order from me,  I will share these things with her. 

All my fellow volunteer posse heard about Laynie, bacause you know I can't do 10 minutes without sharing her, and now are proud owners of purple HOPE FOR LAYNIE bracelets. 

You can't see them too great in this picture, but they are there, and we wore them proudly today, with our "Member of the Baxter Family" tshirts, as we worked together, as a Baxter-loving team, for our new friend, Karen Kingsbury. 

If ever given another opportunity, I will gladly volunteer for her again at another table and sell another 2000 books.   Just, please, for the sake of all that is holy, don't hand me a camera. 

http://www.karenkingsbury.com/  If you don't already know the Baxters, you better just get on the stick, and meet them.