Buried Deep

I have been reading through the bible this year. Committed, faithful, everyday. Something I should have been doing for years, and just never took the time. Until God made sure I had plenty of time, and in my desolation, as many of us do, and the only time many of us do, I turned to God for comfort. I read and meditate on Him everyday.

So the last few days, as life is gettting back to "Normal", I've slowed down the reading. And started to feel disconnected and "sad", if you will. I couldn't understand how I could be "Sad", when I am finally getting back to work, getting my "Life" back.

And as I saw my bible laying by my bed, waiting on me to pick it up and gain my spiritual nourishment, it clicked. I picked up my bible, starting reading where I left off and immediately read what I needed to hear..

"If you would have to go through your house and put all the scripture pictures, the worship music, the encouraging books, any kind of religious material.... and strike a match and burn it all.... would you be buried deep enough in your walk with God, and your knowledge of His word, to be able to pull from your inner resources and stay strong in this world?"

That hit me like a ton of bricks. Here I am, only a couple of days from reading God's word, and I'm feeling disconnected. How many bibles do I own, and have only scratched the surface?? We are reading The Shack in my lifegroup and discussing it, and we talked about God's love last night. And how deep and abiding His love is for us. Though we make mistakes again and again, He is always waiting, with open arms to receive His children back to Him. So much of my life I pictured God as a "Heavenly Gestapo", (if you will), doling out sentences, sending people to Hell. I never "Got" the incredible way that He loves us. Yes, bad things happen. Things happen to get our attention. Things happen of this world that don't make sense. But through it all, through every bad thing, God is there... to carry you and guide you and Love you with a love that has no end. All you have to do is pick up your bible and do your part.

What if you met the most terrific person in the world and wanted to get to know them better? You ask questions, you text, you talk, to spend time in their presence.. well, I've discovered the only way to have my relationship with God, my father, is to Text him (prayer), spend time in His presence (bible and worship music), and have a RELATIONSHIP with Him. What if you only talked to your significant other one time a week ?? (Sunday for an hour, two at the most ??) How long would that relationship last?? A true relationship takes effort and commitment.

Christine Caine said "You have to have your feet firmly planted in God's word, so when the trials of the world Hit you, you are so secure, nothing can shake you". I want that security, I want that peace that only comes with knowing Him.

So, I'll pick up my bible and read on... safe in His pocket and ready to re-enter the world. Buried so deep in His love, nothing will shake me.

It's a problem solving, life changing, love giving, soul sustaining, Life Giver. #1 Bestseller. All you got to do, is pick it up and read it.

On being Half a century

I turned 50 on Monday.  I remember when my mom turned 50.  It was a BIG deal.. she was so...... O.L.D.  Now that I am here, I can say with unwavering certainty, that 50 is NOT old.  50 is just getting started. 

Now there are drawbacks to being 50.  You forget what you are saying in the middle of the sentence.  Your dark lovely hair is now a silver tinted mass.   You can't see squat without your glasses.  The worst part is taking them off and forgetting where you put them, and being unable to see them to find them.  That's cool.   I've always been a bit of a swan, falling at the most awkward times, and that hasn't stopped with age.  I tripped over the gas hose at the station last week, and fell (after hopping and pulling my hamstring trying to catch myself) straight to the ground, taking out my elbow and my right hip.  I still haven't quite figured out how I scraped my left elbow and sprain my right hip, but that's how it turned out.  I used to could fall and be ok, but it took 2, count them, TWO days to start feeling like my old self.  That old commercial... "I've fallen and I can't get up"  rings true.  First thing I thought of when I fell was, "Crap, wonder who saw that", so I knew I wasn't too hurt.  Still worried about "how it looked to others".  

But other than the falling, the blindness, the hair color, the massive chin hairs that grow for no particular reason and at the speed of sound, the hot flashes, and the bladders inability to cooperate on ANY level, during a huge laugh, a sneeze, and just forget about jumping or running, All that?? just pesky little flies in the scheme of life.  Because the good stuff far outweighs the bad.

Your kids are growing up, and becoming your best friends for life.   You actually realize your parents absolutely ARE the smartest things out there and you listen to them....in some cases, they even come to you and ask your opinion.  That's HUGE.  You're relaxed about your house, your hair being fixed every second, and things like what's for dinner?... How about nachos?? are greeted with a resounding  "WOOHOO." 

You get grandbabies that rock your world.  You watch tv and look at the youngsters on the screen and critique them on what they should do, because you've been there and MADE those mistakes. 

God took me out of the fast lane for the last 8 months and made me be STILL.  He made me appreciate life, money, my family, my short time on this planet, and made me understand how everything COUNTS.  Every decision, every plan, every thought, it all counts.   I was rushing through life, not even realizing what was passing me by, until God took everything I THOUGHT I valued away and made me realize that laughing with your kids over P B & J's, walking through your yard actually APPRECIATING the fact that you have a yard, all these things count and are big deals. 

50 is going to be a good year.  And a good launching pad... for the rest of my life.  I'm all about 50.  Fabulous, freeing 50.  Bring it.